Slarty

Off until new year

So from me to all and everybody:

Merry christmas and happy new year

I don't always listen to metal, but when I do...so does my neighbors

I don't always listen to metal, but when I do...nothing else matter

Good bye

Do you know the dyslexic devil worshipper who sold his soul to Santa?

Who is General Failure and why is he reading my hard disk?

Crime doesn't pay, guess my job is a crime...

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already.

Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk...That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.

Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?

Happy new year folks, hope you have a great new years eve and remember...don't do anything I wouldn't hehe, that doesn't exclude much but I like to say it

Merry christmas everyone, hope you have a great day

Why doesn't Santa Claus have kids? He only comes once a year and then it's down a chimney.

Yay, paid vacation for the rest of the year, starting today

EASY: A term used to describe a woman who has the sexual morals of a man.

Proofread carefully to see if you any words out

Any woman can have the body of a 21-year-old, as long as she buys him a few drinks first.

Apple has scrapped plans for a new children's iPod after realizing that "iTouch Kids" is not a good name.

Hockey is a serious game hehe --> http://cdn.gifbay.com/2014/11/hockey_is_truly_a_sport_of_the_gods-158956.gif

I either want less corruption or more chances to participate in it.

Money cannot buy happiness, but it's more comfortable to cry in a Corvette than on a bicycle.

Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you're in.

I accidentally swallowed some Scrabble tiles. My next crap could spell disaster.

How to sell books: Put a girl on the cover, and no cover on the girl...